Come on Boy Wonder
by onecouldn'tsee
Summary: General recap/rantage for 2x20.  Spoilers obviously.  T for Language.


_A/N: So I wrote this for a friend but it's the only thing I've written lately so I thought I'd go ahead and post for kicks. _

_Things you should know first: I'm anti Boremy, anti Delena, anti Matt, anti Jenna, and anti Jules. You'll see minor rantage. I'm warning you now. Also it's a bit snarky. :)_

OKAY. HERE WE GO.

So it starts off at Casa de Salvatore. I mean Casa de Gilbert…? Anyways Damon is in bed, I like it already. But he's eavesdropping on Stefan, Elena, and Elijah. They're recapping what we already know. BORRRRRINNNGGGGGG. Damon gets up and dresses :( to go stir up some trouble. Elijah restates again that Elena has to die. Apparently Klaus has to drain her. Sounds fun. BUT WAIT. Elijah will double the offer for additional shipping and handling! Not really. He's got a potion that will bring her back to life. Maybe. Nonetheless Martyr-I mean Elena is willing to take the chance! Damon argues with all of them. He says they should use Bonnie today. Elena says that will kill her. "I'll write her a great eulogy!" Oh Damon. So snarky. I love you. Oh we also learn the Gilbert ring won't work on Elena cos she's a supernatural being now. Okay…. Elena tells Damon to STFU and he does. Predictable. Sigh. They foreshadow that Klaus is working on getting a werewolf by tonight.

Cut to Carol Lockwood. She is on the phone (dun dun dunnnn) and tells Tyler that she's had a bad fall and is in the hospital. Could he please come home? YES TYLER COME HOME…PURTY PLEASE? Ahem. I'm fine. Back to Carol, she asks Maddox (the boy witch wonder…why is he white btw? Just asking..) why she just said that. Maddox proceeds to throw her off the staircase. Nice.

Damon's drinking. Stefan comes to argue with him. Damon says they shouldn't trust Elijah. They fight again. Stefan says really cheesy stuff. Damon calls him an idiot. Bravo. Damon throws out his drink and walks away.

Elena is talking to Elijah. Explaining AGAIN why she's doing it. Repetitive? Yes. Elijah warns her again that the 'elixir' might not work. We hear Jenna screaming to 'get out!' It's Ric! Yay. He's still alive. For now. -_- He says no it's really me! Jenna grabs a crossbow…teehee. I'm sorry. It looks just as bad as it sounds. I promise. They tell Ric to prove that he's Ric and he says "Uh…okay," looks at Jenna, "the first night we spent together Jeremy walked in right as I was about to-" "Yup it's him!" Jenna proclaims loudly. Like Jer isn't already scarred enough? Good work you fantastic guardian you. Ric says he's here to deliver a message. Long story short, shit goes down tonight. Uh. It's full moon. We already knew that. Ric you are now worthless and ringless. Toe tag waiting. Damon looks at Elena meaningfully. In fact everybody looks around. Elena looks to Elijah and DAYUM does he look hott.

Cut to Carol in the hospital and OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY FUCKING GOD! IT'S TYLERRRRRRR! ! O_O He's a bit scruffy but come on! It's TYLERRRRR! I screamed and kicked my feet like a third grader. Good thing I was sitting down. I should prolly mention that A: Carol looks ridiculous. Can soaps (it's totally a soap, think about it) EVER pull off a hospital look convincingly? B: She got like 50 vases of flowers hella fast. C: Tyler is silhouetted against the window perfectly. *sigh* I'm in love. She calls him over to the bed and sounds all teary which just was quite lovely. And he sounds happy and relieved too and kisses her forehead and it's just AWE. 3 "You're back," she sniffles. "I'm back," he says softly. And his face is just…I am wordless. Trevino, you blow my mind…in so many ways. And then the scene is over. I'd really have liked to know what the hell they talked about since he was missing FOR LIKE A MONTH! COME ON WRITERS. YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE HIM AWAY AND THEN DANGLE HIM LIKE THAT. (I'm kidding just don't kill him and I'll go along with whatever you want I swear…I'll even put up with *gag me* Boremy. Just don't kill my boys…That's right, I'm desperate I'll sell my hopes for what meager things I can get…)

Ahem.

Cut to Caroline perky and adorably awesome as always! She hugs and kisses Matt and asks if they can hang on his break. He's all adorable (Trevino made me go all soft, it's not my fault) when he says he has lunch in an hour. Caroline says perfect and she'll go run some errands and be right back. Awe. But then Matt has to ruin it. *sigh* He goes over to Mamma Forbes who's just chillin in a booth creepily. She leads off with "Did she suspect anything?" I swear all of the grill is eavesdropping right now. It TOTALLY looks like they are getting it on. Matt says he thinks they're in the clear except he can't do this anymore COS IT'S TEARING HIM APART INSIDE! WAH! I added that last bit. Sorry. Mamma Forbes is all *RAWR* she's a vampire and evil you will do as I say or no more nookie for you! I'm adding again. -_- But she seriously says that her daughter is evil and they have to do this. Matt says he doesn't believe that…look who grew a fucking conscious! In fact when she says "she's a vampire" he goes "at this point I don't even know what that means" Let's be honest here Donovan, you've never known what that means. Mamma is all like *RAWR I TRUSTED DAMON RAWR* Matt's like *uum who's fault is that?* Then she's like "THEY KILLED YOUR SISTER!" Bless Matt he actually looks torn up about all this. He prolly still thinks Caroline sprinkled sugar on Vicky's neck before drinking her. "Would you like a straw with that?" They argue pettily like the sham of a terribly thrown together duo they are. She says "woe she's my daughter woe" and he's like Damon is the problem DER. _ Mamma says, "I shouldn't have involved you I'm sorry" A lil late…don't cha think?

Cut to the other half of the gang who fills in Ric on THE SHIT WE ALREADY KNOW. Jesus. Get a little more repetitive. Please. Elena's all like "where's Damon?" Hiding from you bitch. But of course, cos she's not done making his life a LIVING HELL she goes after him. Jenna points her in the right direction…when did she start paying attention? She must have finished her thesis. HOW TO RAISE YOUR SISTER'S CHILDREN SHITTILY, LET THEM ALMOST BE EATEN BY HOMICIDAL VAMPIRES MULTIPLE TIMES, DATE A VAMPIRE HUNTER UNKNOWINGLY, AND TUNE IN JUST IN TIME FOR IT TO BE TOO LATE. I bet she'll get an A++.

Cut to Damon and Elena.  
>"You disappeared." Nuh uh. Yes huh. Nuh unh. Yes huh. _ They argue again. She tries to explain AGAIN. He says they need another way. She says there isn't one. He says she'll die. She says she'll come back to life. Ping pong anyone? Damon says it won't work. Elena says it's her life, her risk. She takes his hand prolly to distract him and it would be a really sweet moment if it wasn't the way it was. He says he can't lose her and she says she won't. Gag me. It's sweet enough to rot out your teeth before it makes you throw up cos you realize how jacked up it really is. DAMON WILL NEVER HAVE ELENA. EVERYONE KNOWS THIS. EVEN DAMON. YOU CAN KNOCK IT OFF NOW WRITERS. Elena the Courageous, thinking he's been mollified goes to leave. Damon blurs in front of her and says there is another way! He grabs her and bites his wrist, feeding her his blood by force. She struggles pointlessly and it takes everyone six years to hear it and come to her aid. I expected this out of you Stefan and the worthless humans but you Elijah? Even you? Stefan and Damon fight and Stefan almost wins until Damon gets him with the floor lamp. Real classy Damon. Elena freaks and orders Damon to leave. You guessed it, he does. Stefan is in Elena's lap and he's apologizing and gurgling a bit and it's actually a really sweet moment. I'm liking Stefan again. (It's Trevino at work I swear..I'm as mushy as a marshmallow at the moment.)<p>

Damon goes downstairs and Elijah didn't even go to check. He's all cool as a cucumber about the fact that Elena is soon to join the undead. He and Damon predictably squabble. Can we please get some loving between them? Just a tiny bit? Prolly not. Hmpf. Elijah says he'll come back later he also tells Damon he knows nothing *damn straight* and that Elena will NEVER forgive him. Oh yeah and NEVER for a VAMPIRE is a very long time. True story. He knows. Damon looks all remorseful. Getting sick of it. Damon is slowly morphing into Stefan. Anybody else see it?

Stefan finishes off the blood Jenna brought her (that thesis is really paying off…for now) and thanks Ric and Jenna for helping him. Ric says they'll be downstairs. He and Jenna talk about dealing with all the vamp stuff. He says he was trying to protect her. This we also already know. He says he should have known she can handle it and she's doing well. (that thesis. yup.) She pulls him close and says she's glad he's okay. She should have said that earlier. They kiss. And Ric's toe tag is filled out. No way is he making it out alive.

Elena the Naïve is angsting. "Why would he do this? Why?" Cos he's Damon. He does unpredictable shit. That's what keeps the show on air. Stefan says "We've never talked about this." Really…never? I mean…I would have thot at some point it would have come up. He IS a vampire. But whatevs. I'll go with it. She says it doesn't matter. He says of course it does. Let me whisk you away. It won't take long. *WHISK*

Back at the hospital Ty *drools* is accosted by the shebitch. I mean Jules. Not to be confused with his comatose mother. She says he shouldn't be here. He's all like she's my mom, I had to come. DER you unfeeling hoor. She says they need to get out of there and grabs his arm. *growls* It is the full moon. Ty accepts this with an adorable little facial shrug. He's so cute. I just wanna hug him. Until I die. I'm not creepy. Not at all.

In the parking lot he and Jules run into Caroline and Trevino and Accola are just so good in this scene. I'll link it for you cos you just have to watch.

www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=HDbPJIEcwGg

In case that doesn't work I'll recap it. Jules is a shebitch before leaving them alone. They make awkward small talk but it's okay cos their expressions are doing all the talking. It's so sad/adorable. He says he has to go and she asks if he's leaving again. He says there's a reason that he left. :*( Caroline says the explanation must have gotten lost in the mail…as well as his goodbye. Tyler clearly struggles for words. His eyes are all kind of perfect. *shiver* He says "Take care of yourself" and walks away and I'm all like noooooo… Caroline goes to go after him but OMG THERE'S SOMEONE MESSING WITH HER HEAD! IT'S A WITCH! AND ONE GETS TYLER TOO!

At this point I jumped out of my chair and was screaming at the TV "No! You can't have them!" But it of course did no good and they took them anyway.

Now don't panic. Breathe.

Oh look. Matt is calling Caroline. "I thot you were coming back…woe." He says they need to talk and it's important. She's a bit tied up right now bud. Cut to Ric and Damon at the bar. They talk about how Damon has screwed up. They're joined by Klaus. Damon asks him to postpone the ceremony. Klaus is all threatening and still adorable? What? He says he has everything so leave it be! "Don't screw it up" Damon says with no werewolf then they can't do the ritual. Ric says he'll die. Damon asks him to help. Ric, God bless him, says "What do you want me to do?" Awe. Man love. We could all use a bit more of that on this show.

Cut to Stefan and Elena who are somehow more bearable this ep? When did that happen? They're hiking up a mountain. She's complaining about her human legs. Shut up Bella. Stefan wants to talk about her maybe becoming a vamp, she says she doesn't want to talk about it. Elena asks why he doesn't just carry her and Stefan says they're hiking damn it!

And we go to Kat. Oh look, Ric is there, he invites Damon in. Damon and Kat fight a bit. Damon tells Ric to leave. Damon says it's time to pay up for the vervain that he gave her. He asks where Klaus is holding the werewolf so he can go kill it. Kat says hell no cos Klaus will kill her. Damon says this is buying her another month. Kat says nope, cos Klaus already has Caroline and Tyler. She's "in the clear" Damon actually looks quite bothered by this. Good for you. Caroline is more awesome than Kat. Damon tells Kat that Elena has vamp blood in her to get her to talk. Kat says they're in the tomb. Really? Nowhere else available? At all? *sigh* Small town I guess.

Caroline and Tyler are in the tomb. She wakes up and they're both chained down. Tyler already tried to get free but she yanks a bit anyways. Here, just watch…

www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=IfoIyLOJZ7A

She basically says that they're up shit creek. Tyler is confused. Well that's what happens when you leave. You miss shit.

Back with Stefan and his vampire bride they're hiking and Elena is trying to pretend that she's cool with all this. Stefan thinks it's cute so he pretends too. She asks him the best and worst parts of being a vamp. His answers are predictable. You live more intensely but you also feel sadness and anger more intensely. Oh a double edged sword. Didn't see that coming. He morosely explains that that's why so many shut their emotions down and he still struggles with it every day.

Klaus comes back to the apartment and asks what Kat has been up to. She lies and says she's been making coffee. He compels her and she lies again. He is suspicious. Must have a good nose. He tells her to take off her bracelet and stand in the sun. She says she'll burn. He doesn't care. She does it so he won't know that she has vervain. That's death for sure. He finally lets her out and says he must have been wrong. He says he needs her to do something for him.

Damon is at the tomb and the white witch (I'm seriously calling him that now) comes out and says he's the guard and Damon ain't getting past him. They fight and just when it looks like Damon is gonna lose Maddox gets shot. Pan up to reveal….MATT? WHAT. THE. FUCK. When did he become useful? Seriously? He must have either read Jenna's thesis or helped her write it. Matt asks where Caroline is and Damon says he's not going to hurt her. How did Matt find out where she was? Seriously? I want to know. I mean it's not like he's an eagle scout. Is another of his part time jobs wilderness tracker? He does got to pay the bills… Anyways, Damon takes his GIANT ASS SNIPER RIFLE and knocks him out with it. Damon tells Matt he already screwed up once today so he won't kill him. Yay. (?) He takes out the wooden bullets and does not look too happy.

Back to Caroline and Tyler in the tomb.

www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=siOmnoE4Yug

I really REALLY hope this works cos it's amazing.

Caroline explains about the sacrifice. Neither of them is happy about it obviously. She asks why he didn't say goodbye. He doesn't want to talk about it. She asks why he left. He says that he knew she hated him (awe.) and that she deserved better than him in her life. D: Nuh unh. She says that she was hurt and felt betrayed but she could never hate him. Then Damon busts in and saves them. They talk about Matt. Ruh ro. Caroline says she's not leaving without Tyler. Damon lets him out but "don't make me regret this" And again, Trevino the eyes. You're killing me. And inspiring me. Thanks…? :[ Obvious foreshadowing if I ever saw it.

Cut to Stefan and Elena the mountain climber. Stefan says he's climbed Everest. Psh. Every vampire SHOULD so shut the hell up. Stefan tells her she can say it and for a while she plays dumb but admits that she doesn't want to be a vampire. Stefan says if he could choose he'd choose to be with her forever, but that'd be selfish. Okay Cullen. Move along. Elena says that Damon took her choice away. Stefan says he shouldn't have but he did it because he loves her. She finally admits that she never wanted to be a vampire. It's actually quite heartbreaking. Stefan hugs her and says that he knows. I may have just fallen in love with him…a little bit.

Damon, Caroline, and Tyler make it out of the tomb. Matt is just waking up. Good timing for the second time in one ep. This thesis must be fucking amazing. Caroline is so cute, "Did you HIT him?" To which Damon responds "wooden bullets..duh." He hit him before he knew about them but she doesn't know that. Suddenly there's a loud crack and Tyler is transforming. Wheeeee. He says it's starting. Yup. Got that. The camera cutting to the full moon in the sky might have been a hint too. Where they in the tomb for THAT long? Really? But then Damon utters my favorite line of the ep "Ugh. Grab Boy Wonder and let's go." Lol. So perfect. And the band of misfit toys begins to make its way through the forest.

Cut to Stefan and Elena getting home in his amazing car that I'm totally stealing one day. They're all adorable until Klaus interrupts. He asks if Elena is ready. Stefan tries to stop her but she says that she won't let him die. They say goodbye which is again very heartbreaking. They kiss and exchange I love yous…it's drawn out very well and Elena tells him to close his eyes. Eventually he does and she takes her hand from his. Once again drawn out very well. *sniffle* When Stefan opens his eyes again both Elena and Klaus are gone. Sadness.

They're still trekking through the woods. Damon again warns Ty not to wolf out. Uh think he's trying dude. Stefan calls and asks what he's doing Damon says saving the day and Stefan's all like uh psych cos Klaus already has her. Damon's reaction actually made me hurt. His face… "Alright…I'll take care of it" Ty is getting worse and Caroline tries to get him to keep going. He says he can't and that they need to leave. When Caroline gets too close he attacks and Damon barely yanks him off. Damon and Ty fight for a moment but separate. Caroline's worried but Damon says he's fine. Ty yells for them to leave again. Damon gives Matt some bullets and says it'll help for a little while at least, he tells them to go to the Lockwood cellar. It's their best bet. Damon blurs away, leaving Ty to transform. Ty…I love you. :[

Klaus goes back to the apartment and asks where Maddox is. Kat doesn't know. Klaus says he should have been back by now. Der. Klaus pulls out another hideous product placement where Jules is on film. Kat asks about Elena. Klaus says she's with Greta. Damon busts in and tells Klaus he has to postpone. Klaus is bored. Damon says he rescued the vamp and werewolf and killed the witch. There's a silent ha added there. Damon says Klaus can kill him cos it was ALL HIM. Klaus tells Kat to leave and then taunts Damon. He says it was a 50/50 shot at which bro would try to stop him. Klaus spins AT&T product placement in hand. Look out Damon! It'll lure you in and then be super slow and make you want to kill yourself…more than you already do. Klaus says he's learned a thing or two. Wolves travel in packs (I learned that in second grade but whatever) and that you should always have a spare. He just so happens to have a spare witch and a spare werewolf. And Damon adds reluctantly, a spare vamp. Once again Damon looks upset by the development.

Caroline is leading Matt through the woods. They make it into the cellar. It looks pretty bad for them…I'm just saying. Ty's fully transformed and is growling. There's only one, very old gate between them. Caroline tries to talk to him. Doesn't appear to be working. He lunges and the camera cuts away. Thx. -_-

Meanwhile Kat is trying to wake Damon up. Klaus didn't take him. He's gone. Kat apologizes for something. She says Klaus made Kat call her to lure her out. He needed another vamp. Damon asks who she called, they cut away.

Over to Greta and Elena, it's revealed that Greta is with Klaus WILLINGLY. Well that's nice for her fam. Elena complains about the lighting. Greta lights a bunch of shit on fire. Uneccessary. Elena runs forward to see….JENNA! SHE'S DEAD! OMG. EXCEPT SHE'S NOT DEAD. SHE'S TRANSITIONING. They turned her into a vamp. This makes sense how? Oh right. This is the Vampire Diaries. Check your sense at the door. Elena is upset.

Damon is too. Go figure. He asks why Klaus didn't use him. Well cos he's got a handy dandy werewolf bite. Uh oh. More of Damon's wonderful reactions. Oh Ian. So good. :D

And fin!

Until next week…. -_-


End file.
